‘Bet You Didn’t Know’ Tag

Bet You Didn’t Know

This post is going to be a little different. I had the pleasure of being tagged by my wonderful friend, Jenni, from Housewife Hustle, and challenged to tell you, my readers, a little about myself. If you are an avid follower, you may be biting your nails in anticipation. Who is this Messy Mama?

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Since this is a tag about myself, and you, my reader, will be indulging in information you may or may not care about, I want to take this time and thank you, personally, for joining me on this journey. My hope is that I have given you something out of my blog, whether it’s helpful information as a new mama, great reading material for the stay at homie, or even a look into my blogging technique. Maybe, your just here for the connection. Either way, thank you for taking time out of your day to support me and follow along as I put my heart into words.

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Facing Fear

This post is part of My Journey Forward, a blog series about finding purpose during motherhood, and building motivation as a Stay At Home Parent; to have the ambition and courage to go after our own goals. After all, life doesn’t stop when they place that baby in our hands or when black leggings and dry shampoo become a daily ritual. It’s time to take your dreams off of the back burner. Join me as I rediscover myself as a Stay At Home Mom, crush my goals, and help you find more meaning in your day to day.


 

Facing Fear

Fear is a funny thing. It can either motivate us or prevent us from moving forward. It can be the driving force behind achieving our goals or it can be the road block that keeps us from trying. What ever roll it plays in our life, it is a constant reminder of either who we are afraid to be, or what we are afraid to do. It lives all around us, reminding us that we are not good enough, and we don’t deserve to be who we want to be. Fear can push us to be good parents, but then remind us that we’re not. Fear can hinder us from going after our dreams, and tell us that there is no point.

How does fear work within your life? 

What is the fear that is holding you back? What keeps you from acknowledging how great you really are? What is keeping you from loving the life you are living? What is preventing you from moving forward? It’s time to recognize what our fears are and label them? We need to dig into the reasons that lay beneath those fears, then it’s time to take them head on. It’s time to face our fears: To remove the block that keeps us stuck, and to find a new motivation that emanates a more positive purpose.

Are you ready?

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My 4 Favorite Pregnancy Tracker Apps

*This post is part of The Pregnancy and Delivery Series. Follow Messy Mama for more information on pre-pregnancy, pre-natal and post-natal. Check back for updates.


 

The days have crept by since you first received your positive pregnancy test. You’re waiting anxiously for your first prenatal doctor visit. You’re biting your nails in anticipation to hear the sound of your tiny beans heart beat and you cant wait to see the little sprout in your first ultrasound. What can you do to pass the time, and see how your little one is developing?

For starters, you can download a pregnancy tracker!

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Slapping

This post is a part of the Sunday Morning Coffee Thoughts on my Facebook at messymama18. Like me page and join in on the conversation each Sunday as I discuss motherhood, toddlers, SAHM life, parenting with anxiety, Target, and so much more.


 

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Morning Coffee Thoughts

The first time we get whacked in the face by our toddler, we are thrown off guard and are completely surprised. How could our sweet, innocent, adorable little mini human act so devilish. We take it personally, don’t we? Firstly, we’re like, “I’ve never taught them that? Why would they just to that?” Like we failed at parenting. Secondly, we are furious that our child would dare reach across the child – to – parent boundary and have the nerve to violate us.

The truth is, most parents are aware that children just don’t have the mental strength to express their emotions appropriately. Unfortunately, we are our children’s personal punching bag as they navigate through their emotions. Welcome to parenthood!

We know this, yet that doesn’t stop us from letting our ego take over when we feel the sting from that tiny hand. Grab a cup of coffee, take a seat, and let’s discuss Slapping Toddlers and the 5 Stages of Parent Guilt, on this edition of Morning Coffee Thoughts.

5 Stages of Parent Guilt When Slapped by Our Toddler

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Denial

When we are slapped by our minion, the first response is shock. Regardless if it’s the first time or the 100th time, we are thrown off guard when our child hauls off and open hands us across the face. We refuse to accept that this tiny creature could muster up the courage to cross the threshold of violence. We feel hurt and betrayed.

Anger

The hurt transforms into anger and we take their reaction personal. We allow our instincts to take over and our ego is bruised. “How dare they,” we proclaim. “I am the parent,” we tell ourselves. “This child has disrespected me.” Once the hurt subsides into anger, we may contemplate retaliation. Yes, I said it. We may, for just a second, think that we have to return the act, and put this defiant creature in their place.

Bargaining

Once the anger settles and we move toward reasonable thinking, we question our parenting. “Am I a bad parent?” we may ask ourselves. We wonder if we are raising a bratty, and disrespectful child. Are we doomed? You may comb through the last year or so, and try to pinpoint where you went wrong.

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Depression

Guilt grows and it eats away at us. We assume we are shitty parents and we begin to seek out advice from anyone and everybody who has an idea. Panic rolls through us as we worry that we created the next serial killer. We resort to parenting books and we try every tip. Each time an attempt fails, we fall deeper and deeper into our hole.

Acceptance

Finally, we realize that our child’s behavior is actually pretty normal. Realistically, they have only been on the planet for a short period of time; they are just expressing themselves through instinct, and less through logic. They will learn how to properly express themselves as they get older. The truth is, toddlers are just assholes, and you’re not a shitty parent.

Keep your head up! You’re slap happy toddler may not have the self control to know better just yet, but hopefully your understanding of the situation will help you model proper behavior. In the meant time, maybe you should get a helmet?

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Check out my Sunday Morning Coffee Thoughts video and follow me on Facebook for more coffee conversations every Sunday.

 


 

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*Disclaimer – Statements made in this post are of my own opinions, views and thoughts. I am not a professional and should not be regarded as such.

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Copyright © Messy Mama 2019 https://messymama18.com

From Baby to Toddler

From Baby to Toddler

Nothing speeds up time faster then having children. One moment, we are sitting in our childhood bedrooms, anticipating tomorrow’s test, the next we are handed a little creature and thrusted into the life of parenthood. Our anxieties were once surviving high school and avoiding the mean girls, and now they are wrestling through diaper changes and our child’s health. It is strange what time does to us.

The first time I held my daughter after she was born, she was incredibly light, fragile and so tiny. I remember thinking how amazing it was that the little creature I had in my arms fit so perfectly in my belly. The fact that she started out as this small little spec, and suddenly she was on the outside, so beautiful and so very real. I remember being so afraid of dropping her. I got nervous when other people handled her. Even when my husband held her, I felt anxious. Spoiler: no one dropped her. 

For me, the newborn stage was hard, but I still tried to soak her in as much as I could. I snuggled her close to my face, and I absorbed her baby smells. Her noises echoed in my ears. Her adorable Newborn clothes were big on her. She swam in them, and I was blown away by it. She loved being close to Mommy, the only time she would tolerate being put down was in her rock and play. She loved to eat. She ate a lot, and she grew fast. Before I knew it, she was wearing 0-3, then 3-6. She skipped 6-9 and went straight to 12 months. And she kept growing.

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Running With Fear

Running With Fear

I usually run around my block in the morning. Since the sun is rising later, I have turned to the gym to run on the dreaded treadmill. I hate the treadmill, but I’m afraid to run in the early, dark hours. I am scared that something bad is going to happen to me and I won’t see it coming. Women are vulnerable when it is dark and they are alone. This is the norm society has built around us. So, as I train to run a half marathon, I also have to keep in mind my safety. 

Half of my concern is legitimate because women do get assaulted while they are out running or walking. That is the world we live in. The other half of that fear is from my anxiety, which enhances the mindset from cautious to down right fear. My anxiety causes me to fear things like crowded rooms with few exits, open areas of large crowds, tight spaces, and the dark. I avoid opening day at the movie theater, I’m not a fan of parades or festivals, I sleep with a light on, planes make me extremely nervous, and I usually don’t go out after dark. This is my life.

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